Fiddle-Faddling around.....

It's Saturday morning around 9AM, watched the morning news and the weather channel, then did Facebook, Farmtown and Farmville and emails. I was surprised to read my friends posts from west Kentucky and surrounding areas post on Facebook they have 8 inches of snow. All I'm seeing on the Weather Channel is Washington DC and their snow fall.

I do get aggravated with the regular cable Weather Channel sometimes, then neglect the weather in the west and are more partial to only the east coast. So here we go again - they left out the mid west. Don't they realize there are plenty of people and weather there in that region of the U S!!! Get real folks at the Weather Channel!!! Hello!

There is total cloud cover in the Las Vegas Valley right now. I can imagine Mt. Charleston is covered with snow, which is a good thing. Our trees are barren but there have been as many as 50 birds resting in the three trees in the back yard. I'm watching it drizzle and I know there is a bigger rain heading our way. When I write about our rain I feel guiltily weird because some of you may have gotten more than your share and I wonder if you are thinking "what's up with that?" Well we've been in a real drought situation. Our Lake Mead is drying up. We need more than one season of rain to fill it back up to the level it was years ago, so that's kinda why I talk about it often.

Bob and I are home alone this weekend. At this moment, the only noise in the house is the air blowing through the heater vents. It is lovely. I can hear the rain falling outside and the birds singing. I enjoy peace and quiet. I love my kids and grand kids deeply, but I cherish the quiet! Bob, for some reason, likes to have the TV on with no sound - personally I like no TV - no distractions.

On a different level - what are your plans and hopes for this year? Do you have something special to look forward to? Will you travel? Or, are you in a conundrum of sorts with so many things to sort out that some days you feel like you'll never get it straight?

I'm like that right now - in a conundrum of decision. In my lifetime, I've never been in this state of mind, is it my age, the situation, too many people involved therefore too many considerations? I never worried about the too many people before, it just all seemed to work out, but it seems like the end with this decision, finality. The last one, so it has be to good. It is a heavy worry weight that I can't get a grip on to solve. Maybe it isn't time yet to solve the problems. I've always trusted in God and knew He was guiding me in all my decisions. There was a peace about it, I knew the decision was right. It's almost like He's telling me to sit still, there's something more to happen, there's more to it, just wait. But, sometimes I have a fear that maybe I'll be too late. I am concerned about our future as so many are today. I know we could screw up badly then be in the poor house if we don't act, but then maybe not - maybe acting impulsively is wrong, maybe that's why the feeling of "wait!" Nothing is falling in place - if it was right, it always did, and it worked. Not today, there always seems to be something new come into the picture of our life.

I complain and grumble about my life, but I am blessed. I see some friends - not all - believe me I wouldn't have wanted to walk in their shoes either any more than they would have wanted to walk in mine and I don't mean that in a negative obnoxious way - but a couple of friends have succeeded to the top in their career field and have had the freedom to travel. I chose another direction of being a stay at home mom. I worked sometimes and after the kids grew up, I had several different and wonderful jobs and attended college all of which helped me realize I had it where I needed it - the creativity and smarts - and if I had to, or needed to work, I could find a job. My life choice was to care for my husband and my family's needs. I'm not saying that working mothers aren't dedicated and wonderful at what they do. I know many women who could handle it all - but for my husband of now 45 years, I knew what he liked, for him this was the route I choose, I knew what was required, no words spoken, I just sensed it.. So I get upset with myself sometimes for thinking about the other direction I could have gone. If I had failed to follow my heart which was and is my love, all things would have been different.

With that thought in mind ----through our belief and trust in God, does our faith instilled us with a "homing device" which is connected to HIM and through that connection we are led in the direction which best serves HIM to love and be a better person?