Nothing but everything

Have you sat down to put your daily chores in order but realized you forgot the pencil and paper, then after searching everywhere for your writing materials, you forgot the duties you needed to accomplished, the purchases needed, and what day it was?

I am in my groove accomplishing what I set out to do everyday as I organize this office/bedroom. I don't want to stop because I am afraid if I leave the house I will get behind and before I know it, Tom and his friend will be home. Time waits for no man and every minute counts towards an accomplishment to the end. Being an old person, it is very necessary to plan time effectively and give enough space for rest, forgetfulness and unexpected situations. When I was young, I could do anything and did accomplish a lot in a short period of time. Now, I have aches and pains and no idea where they came from or why I have them, and as I prayed to God to have a close family, He gave me my wish and they are here all the time, so I have to adjust to their beings and listening to their troubles. I am surprised that recently I found myself saying to one of my son's, I've got to get back to my work as he was expressing himself about a situation he was dealing with - I have always listened, sometimes giving advice but knowing they don't take my advice - I still voice my opinion, sometimes, I don't know why. But, I've always listened. I surprised myself, and I also realize I've developed a blank stare and a blank mind sometimes as I listen, hearing almost the same complaints but on different situations. I wonder without speaking "when they are going to learn." Egads! Little do they know how difficult it is for me to focus after they interrupt me even as minor as my project may seem to them. This, I feel, is my payment for praying for a close family. I believe that God took me literally rather than giving me leverage. Hence, so the saying goes - "be careful what you pray for, you may get it!"

Don't get me wrong, I love my family, but I need space and even as large as this home is, they find me. When we lived on the farm in Kentucky, Bob's grandparents lived on the farm next to us. I would steal out of the house and walk over to Grandma's and visit - without the kids hanging on. She would always cook something - like her wonderful fried chicken, just a drumstick and maybe fried apples - no big enormous meal. Food was the way of sharing in those days at those places. It was inevitable the kids would realize I wasn't at home and they would either call grandma's - no cell phones then - or they would come after me. Grandma always made some comment about the kids not leaving me alone. And, so it continues today.

Bob jokes, no matter where we went, they would follow. I am looking forward to downsizing then traveling for months on end without being found - cell phones off. Bob hasn't been fishing in years. I enjoy watching him fly fish - he's an enjoyable image to gaze upon, doesn't matter whether he moves slower or has more flesh on his physique, he remains the best looking guy on this earth - dressed or not!

We celebrated the 45th year of the day we met recently and I will never forget the first time I saw him. There's a lot that's changed, but our love and commitment has grown stronger. I know this advice is probably very old fashioned, but I told Soldier Tom recently, in my opinion, what makes a strong relationship, is commitment to God and faith, a sense of humor and respect. I could add compromise, but that works in with respect, I think. It's not a 50-50 deal, one has to weigh what is important at the time and both must adjust.

I had previously written about stolen identity - It is Soldier Tom who has been affected. While he was in Iraq, someone used his social security and purchased furniture there in Fayetteville - a store way south of Ft. Bragg. We are in the starting stages of trying to sort through it all. I have contacted our Senator here in Nevada, although I don't think there's much he can do right now. I've talked to others and gotten advice. I really feel for Tom, he's so conservative and thoughtful. I think this stinks, and if they find who did it, I hope they put them in jail - to do something like this to anyone is an abomination, but to a soldier serving in Iraq is a huge sin in my book.